What Stands Between Us and a Fully Realized Experience of the Day

Focused on the wrought iron gate as a barrier, we may fail to see the good things in store for us when we venture forth past the "negativity." The metaphor of the gate posts or pillars really is a great device of art, and the wrought iron gate whether of geometric rigor or floral relief can suggest everything from a maze to a jungle within, but unless our myopia is sublimated, we may miss out on what lies ahead. The essay which follows was prompted by the art work of Theresa Stahl, an artist whose work can be viewed at her blog [ http://wp.me/p38un8-v2 ].

What Stands Between Us and a Fully Realized Experience of the Day

By Rick Hilber

What in life I thought I had to have and over which I agonized the "not having," have both proven to be transitory "brain farts." Viewed conceptually by the artist the two mental concepts of desire and disappointment are also the pillars on the gate into the future. We have to walk past them into the present moment. Why is that so? If we fail to leave them behind, we will not have a fully realized present. The day itself transpires, but we will have failed to experience it in not being fully present and engaged. Why is it that capacity to live in the moment should require of us any amount of mental and emotional effort?

Because we were mired, stuck in the childish funk of desire and disappointment (which “funk” we had failed to leave behind). As adolescent as adults can sometimes be, our peers see us as detached, moody, and distant. Traits of an isolate are human enough to own having, but these traits which, to say the least, deprive not only ourselves, but our mates, our children, and in general “the other,” are the human condition in reverse. They inform us that we are social animals. You know this is true!

Picture a store clerk who sees you as a person, not just a customer. The clerk takes a moment to engage you and express direct interest in you, or maybe just a warm greeting. The time flies past and you walk out of that store with, or without, your purchase. You both have been enriched by the exchange. What is right about this picture?

I for one will go back to that store when a desire later is disclosed to be a need. I will buy that leather belt which is not just functional, but quality, and someone’s handiwork. And in my mind’s eye, I will see the smile on the sales person’s face even though she be absent in fact from my view. This happened to me this summer in Osceola, Wisconsin. I actually smile everytime I put that belt on for Sunday mornings.

Our present is what we actually have and in its becoming our past, we realize we have had no end of delight in what has proven far better than that pillared wormhole through which we had to pass and now just the left behind, the "not to be" of the self-actualization process.

The flip side of the delight of which I speak is an adult view of acceptance of the gifts of the day itself which acceptance is central to what it means to be adult. The young child can have this adult quality. I’ve seen it, and I know it’s so.

Remember the child that raged about what he or she had to have, threw herself down, and wept and raged. Come back in fifteen minutes, and you the parent will see she will be sitting with her sister throwing her head back and laughing outloud. Temper tantrum followed by love fest!

I too was once that child! No one ever called me a "drama queen" back then, but that's not to say the six year old I then was could not throw a good row over disappointment. Hopefully, I am now a little smoother about going through the pillars into the present moment. Life is like that! You have to show up, have your boots on, and ride that bicycle (even though it was not the Hawley Davidson you thought you had to have).

RJH. Thursday, October 10, 2013.